I Promise.

What to blog about.  So much has happened today, from being soaked in a bloody yellow top the day I decide to wear a black bra to work, and of course it went see through, so I had all the guys cheeking me... then once I had finally dried off (thank god it was sunny), I got soaked again.  *sigh* boys.

To a recording session for a new song, that I still need to 

finish words for.  Great fun as usual, with the most awesome counter melodies you will ever hear!

Today, I also had overwhelming verbal constipation like I've never had before and still on the brink of tears (which are happy) but because of a promise, I'm keeping them in with great difficulty.  I'm sure they'll force their way out soon but not for now... as promised.

So good night all, this blog has done absolutely no justice to the day I've had and the moments within them.  Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for a Raine-y day =)

Starry Starry Night

Jeeze what a day!  I had everyone shouting at me today, I even had my first ever complaint about me. Great.  I also got my break really early today, and when I came back I still had 6 hours straight of work to do.  I was NOT happy.  I get my break really late or really early and am left hungry and grumpy.  I was so angry by 5 o'clock I was just about ready to rip someone's head off.  But a few smiles from my friends and some very loud music playing my head I calmed down and the day finished very well.  After news that a trip went well (and I've now got reasons to love the French, but perhaps not as many as the reasons to hate them lol) I've just walked home from my aunt's house, where we ate lasagna made from the pasta we brought back from italy and then we watched a chick flick an laughed all night long.  On the walk home, I held my brother's hand (It was reaction to grab somebody as soon as I stepped into the darkness, but I didn't feel one bit scared at all) walking back up the hill as he gave me a lesson on the solar system.  He also pointed out that it was the first time he had held my hand in about 6 years, and it felt like we were little again, and it reminded me just how close we really are, and how I do forget that most of the time.  The sky was so pretty tonight, I felt like I hadn't seen the stars in such a long time, that it was kinda like seeing a friendly face after being away from home for a while.  And Marina comes back on Monday.  God I've missed her, I can't wait to give her a 21 minute hug =D

Infinite Imagination

So take me to the place where time seems to travel fast

Where demons become unmasked

And leave my head to infinite imagination

So take me to the place where time seems to stand still

Where worlds of heros fill my head 

With freedom and dreams of Oscar nomination.

Buzzing With The Wonders Of Infinite Imagination!

The only bad thing about having a mac in your room with Logic on, is the fact that you can get a little carried away when you do indeed have an awesome idea!  I did actually plan to get to sleep by about 10, because I'm knackered, but lo and behold an idea for lyrics pops into my head and the rest is history.  And now it's almost mid night... and I still have a little bit more to do... ah well, tis worth a few tired days!!

Unicycleity

Well, my boat to University is booked.  I leave in exactly a month, 26th September 2008 at 14:30.  I've got my room at uni and I've got the address, which I shall soon be giving out to those who want it!  Pretty scary actually.  But god damn exciting!  Off to do what I've wanted to do since I found out what a piano was and what it sounded like inside a church.  Wow, non stop music and composition!  Sugar (and blood oranges) free and rearing to head to that future!

I can't wait for the day that I shall be sitting cross legged in the middle of my first 120 piece film orchestra with the one and only genius conducting.

Rome to Home

Bonjourno!  Ah, so back from the most beautiful city I've ever had the pleasure of visiting.  Endless blue skies and sunshine and roman cities and art to discover.  The Chapel in which Michel Angelo painted the hand of God was the most awesome sight ever.  To get to see the real thing, with my own two eyes was just breath takingly amazing.  Eating a meal in the night sky and the Colosseum lit up behind us as the stars shone was also amazing, and in a place I'd never thought I'd be.  I saw a bride and groom having their wedding photos out side the lit up Colosseum, what a beautiful setting.  She looked stunning too.  We saw the roman ruins, the statues of Emperors, magnificent buildings, and views, wedding cake buildings, genuine Michel Angelo and much much more.  Hidden alleyways that hold secrets and a Michel Angelo statue of the naked Jesus.  Absolutely beautiful and tucked away in a Church (one of 937 in Rome), a best kept secret that no one can find (unless with a tour guide!  who was rather good looking lol).    But most importantly I got to go to the Trevi Fountain, where I made my wish with my fist clenched around the coin, my eyes closed as I muttered my wish before throwing the coin into the magnificent and beautiful fountain... opened my eyes... and had a shock when I saw someone sitting there, but not as I expected.

On the way back today, whilst staring out of the plane onto sun rise and orange and pink and red and yellow and white fluffy clouds, I listened to The Clarinet and Celesta, full and pizz versions, and they just fitted so well, especially as we flew over the snow capped mountains of the Alps.  Happiest Ending also fitted perfectly...  =)

Ah, my feet are SO sore, blistered and tired and I can't wait to get into my lovely bed.  Up since three this morning but still buzzing, and ready for a nice early swim tomorrow to start working off my pasta gut!!  Unfortunately they didn't allow me to bring back Lasagna through customs! 

Be Seeing You Indeed.

A blog I wrote last night before my internet cut out!

Ah, so I'm off to Rome tomorrow evening.  Straight after work I shall be off to the airport, so this may be my last blog until I come back (late monday night), unless I decide to post tomorrow morning...

Today has been interesting, starting off by being grabbed, picked up and thrown into the freezing pool by Dan, my friend who's moto is "LIFE'S TOO SHORT NOT TO FLIRT".  lol!  He makes me laugh and makes the days go a bit quicker at work.  Another great swimming lesson, with vast improvement and more smiles.  Work was better than I thought it would be.  There were most of my favourite colleagues on duty today, so again, lots of laughs and high spirits and songs going round and round my head that I apparently danced to without realizing, which made people laugh.  Another false emergency alarm went off, again, pushed by some idiotic teen. *sigh*

I got home, and got slightly amazed and pissed off at the rules of clothing and general society and how petty it all is.  I mean, who ever said it was absolute rule and law to wear two shoes that look the same?  Surely, the job of the shoe, is to protect and provide comfort?  So if both shoes fit like a glove and are comfy and provide protection to my feet, why the hell do they have to match?  Why is it so outrageous to wear "odd" shoes?!  And why does it matter if your converses looked old and battered?  Do I care what others think about my beloved shoes?! NO!!  I got asked "If you weren't a converse freak, and you saw someone walking down the street with those on, you wouldn't think dirty trollop?  are you serious?  you wouldn't think that?  of course you would"... NO I wouldn't!!!!!  I'd think, hmm, cool shoes!  Why would I care if they had a bit of dirt on them?!  I'm not allowed to been seen wearing them in Rome, because it really matters what others think of my bloody shoes.  I'm not taking any comfy shoes for walking around a big city in for goodness sake, because they're too scruffy.  *sigh*

Well that was the rant for the day.  There was much better things to be said that happened today, but brain fart is very powerful I can feel it making my fingers tired at typing.  Saying noooo, I'm fucked, leave me alone.  

Don't just hear... Listen.

Isn't it funny, how listening to a song you haven't heard in ages gives you goose bumps and shivers, memories rushing back into your mind like a cascade of rain, ending in a smile and a few warm tears.  Rain, rain, rain...   Its sweet tune, with the best sound in the world, and all the effort that went into chopping it up and pasting it together for the sake of 40 winks and happiness.

How what you might call sacrifice (I don't know the right word) is worth everything, worth the words "I promise" and what they mean, worth a smile on somebody else's face, worth knowing that it's all over... I didn't buy any Queen tickets this year, even thought I had full opportunity to do so. Because of the fact that I just can't listen to Queen any more.  I can't listen to that voice, not any more, because I believe him, every word he says... his voice sticks like the strongest glue... his voice that I love so much, that brought me comfort and company and gave me an escape that I couldn't find any where else.  But now, that has all changed, and so, I must not listen to my favourite band in the world, the voice I never want to stop listening to, but have to.  Because that is worth everything.

Listen, to things that you will never even hear.  Because silence is sometimes more powerful than any words.  And it's true that the longer you wait to say words that have stacked up to scrape the skies and stars, the harder it gets to say them.  So listen.  Always.

Well That Was Bad Timing...

hhhmmmm... There are many things right now that seem to be happening with very bad timing.  All due to me being off this September.  Take for instance work.. I've met so many great people within the last month that I feel I've become friends with that I wish I'd started life guarding at the Aqua Splash last year when I first got my qualification. Then  I would have known them and gone out with them, and had a whole new group of good friends.  Bad Timing.   

Also, I've never been so close to so many people as I have this year.  I feel my group of friends from Beaulieu have become so tight and close just in this last year... but now we all have to go in different directions.  I wish I'd become close friends with Tori and Alex at least two years before and same with the rest of my friends.  We're just so close and now we have to break apart.  Bad Timing.

Trust me to start fancying someone (for a long time now), but not doing anything about it earlier.. and now I'm off to uni, so is there really any point?  Only to have a short relationship and have to say good bye and break up when I go off to uni?  I don't even know what I'm jabbering on about, I don't even think they like me back, and I'm too shy to ask (lol), so fat chance of it happening anyway.  Bad Timing.

Ahh, there's so many other things that seem to be happening with bad timing.  Oh well, fate, life or just bad luck?

lol

The great thing about being young is that I don't suffer from hangovers lol.  Thank God my internet cut out last night, I was about to publish a drunken post that is rather (not embarrassing) but I dunno... something I'm shy about.  lol.   

I went out last night completely forgetting that I hadn't eaten since breakfast that morning (at about 8:30), went to the cinema swearing to get a KFC when I got out, but completely forgot, had a couple of drinks and they went straight to my head. woops!  Oh well, twas a good night after all!

A note to Marina, I have bright orange hair!  hahahahahaha, it's short as well!  Helen said i definitely can't call her ginger now haha (I'm still going to, of course) ;-)

666!

Woop!

I now have the shiny new Sibelius 5 on my Mac!  How lovely!  Thank you!!!

I know the exact piece I shall be scoring first!  

Drift...

Urgh.  What a day.  I feel like I was put on a wave and left to drift, up and down.  The day started with excitement, went down hill a tad, then back up again when I realised a few things.  It then went back down again when I felt selfish and idiotic and generally in a shit mood with myself.  I also got angry at examiners and universities for not recognising talent and hard work, even with good grade to prove it.  I then went to my work party to chill myself out, it was great fun for the first hour, nothing like a swim after all.  But then it went rapidly down hill as we pulled Rosie out the water, with blood absolutely everywhere, pouring down her face from her head where she smashed it on the floor after doing a dive, suspected spinal.  The ambulance came after we cleaned her up and did our best to keep her conscious and still.  God I was so worried, it's Rosie after all.   Thankfully she's had her head glued up and injuries to her neck aren't bad, but it definitely gave me a shock.  My first life guard rescue and it was on my day off to one of my closest friends.  I also had to scrub the floor and clean the pool for blood.  So again in a very bad mood feeling shit and worried I went back home early from the party.  But then we had a family BBQ to get to, which was really nice, all sat around the fire, drinking champagne to celebrate my results, and I was in a really good mood.  But I then went back down hill again how ever, for no apparent reason, feeling pretty much like I did when I saw Rosie being pulled out the pool.  But then a couple of nice phone calls and a meet up with Alex in Chambers sorted that out too.  So now I'm pretty tired, but once again pretty happy.  Ahhhh.  hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, and Saturday even better.  Pink hair here I come.

Catch Me If You Can!

Wow.  Quite overwhelmed actually!  I found out that Hertfordshire had accepted my place at about half 7 this morning, after waking up every hour to check the bloody thing... I did my leprechaun dance in celebration as my heart leap out of my chest, I was so excited.  I didn't care what grades I got, point was, I got in.  

But then nerves kicked in along with excitement as I realized once more that I do in fact care very much about what grades I got.  One A and 2 Bs... A for RS believe it or not!! (isn't that ironic).  I was incredibly happy with my RS and English results as they were better than I'd hoped for.  As for music tech, I got a B, which I'm really happy with too, but if I'm honest I can't say I wasn't a little disappointed that the piece of paper didn't have that particular vowel on it, but at the end of the day, it's only a piece of paper.  B is bloody good and there's no way I could have worked any harder in that subject, so no point in being anal about it all!  

Wow, I'm off to college to become a famous film composer! hehehehhahahaahahaaaaa!  Watch out world! Here I come!!!  A huge big thank you to all who made that possible.  Here's to the greatest teacher on earth! =)

Also, well done to all my friends, A level and AS level, you all did really well and I'm incredibly proud of all of you!

Bollards.

I hate waiting...  only 3 and a half hours before doomsday.  UCAS track is still updating, I woke up pretty much every hour to check it, it it's still down. 

I Look At You

So to pass the time I decided to record a cover of a band called Lorel Canyon... A piano called Ronald, some ahs and five vocal lines so far... UCAS Track is still updating... I think I'll go to bed now.

Catch A Falling Star...

Have you noticed how beautiful the sky is tonight?  With the moon lighting up the grey clouds as it hides behind them, swirling... as the stars shine through even though the cloud is thick... The rain pouring down though the sky is still clear... Have you listened to the roaring symphony that is being sung by the trees as the wind hits the earth like a composer to his orchestra...

Breath it in, anyway you can, forget all your worries and think, wow, I'm so happy that I'm here, alive, right now, just to be able to say, I'm a part of this magnificent symphony orchestra, playing it's beautiful music... when the sky meets the sea who greets the land.

ARGH!!!

Grrr what a boringly horrible day.  It was crowded and busy and full of grumpy people that liked having a go at me.  And pouring freezing cold water down the crack of my arse. (NICE).  Why do people have to be so rude and arogant and lazy and disgusting?!  Gobbing all over bins and spitting on the floor and leaving soiled nappies for me to pick up and shouting for no reason just cause you dont like the rules and throwing rubbish on the floor and smearing your shit all over the walls for me to clean up!!!!!  Ggggrrrrrrr!!!! I need something to chill me out now!  That little rant helped a bit lol.

A few hours on Logic should do the trick! =)

I hate Helen!!!

(don't care what you say, or show me... I'm still right!!! and better than you!)

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

I was hanging out of my Nan's window last night, looking at the amazing sky.  It's great that the windows are huge, I can sit on them and not fall out because they open sideways rather than up.  There were stars everywhere, so bright I swear I could see a whole different galaxy.  The air was beautifully clean and not too cold... so I just hung there and breathed for a while and stared for a while and thought for a while.  Everything was deafeningly quiet all around me and it was just so nice. 

Normally, if I were at home, I'd be struggling to hang out my window to get a decent look at the sky, but hey.

Dunno why I blogged this, guess it was just a nice moment that I thought I'd share with you guys.  I also made a few wishes on a remarkably bright star.  It looked lonely as there was quite a space between itself and the next clump of stars.  I don't think it was the north star, because I think the window I was hanging out of happens to point south.  But hey!  No shooting stars though.  Maybe I just don't how to look for them.

Dude!  There's just so much great stuff going on at the moment, I don' really know where to begin...  I've had a great two days off, starting with Thomas recording in the double bass line to finish off a song, which made it sound complete and brilliant!  We then went back to mine, where Thomas helped me with "the till" and we watched Mock the Week... After that we then set up in the studio with comfy sofas and mood lighting to watch the rest of Flight of the Conchords. (lol).  So that was Thursday...

Yesterday was great too, with a recording session in the morning to add more vocal lines to catch me, which was as always great fun, and very out of tune!  I then took over the studio to try mixing "Home is Where Your Piano Is", which was great fun and it meant that I'm learning more and more about protools as I go along. =)     Then there was another film night down at Dave's, where we finally watched team America and 50 first dates!

Not forgetting to mention the shiny new R1 that I've seen.  I got really excited just looking at it!

Geek!

Last night I was on my way to pick Alex up.  It just so happens that the clothes I had chosen to wear might have been something similar to something I'd wear for school, so, a white blouse type thing with my waistcoat and jeans.  The route i take to get to her house is the route I take for school.  

Sad little me got all excited. la la la...  I had to actually tell myself out loud, "no, Freddie, you're not going to school."  *cough*  I then remembered what I was wearing and shook my head lol.  I was even listening to what i would normally be listening to on the way to school too... oh dear!

=D

Lullaby dreams

I've been having some really strange dreams lately! 

The other night, for instance, I dreamt that Helen is going out with Lyle... Doesn't sound like much but they were trying to keep the fact that they were going out from me.  Go out behind my back, with all my other friends knowing and not telling me. I wonder why?  *shrug*.

Last night I dreamt that I got two As

 and a B for my A levels.  But it caused me to wake up and panic.  Shit. One week.  What happens if it all turns out like last year? They hate my course work, or I might think I know about Danny Elfman, but in fact I don't. Or what happens if the war books I wrote about were the wrong ones and I was blabbing about the wrong things.. or blabbing too much?   What happens if I didn't write about enough scholars and put enough quotes?  All my hard work, wasted for a few shitty exams and a stuck up examiner?  Ah man.  I find it ironic that with my ASs, I'm currently on 2 As and a B - and the B is for music. *sigh*

I'm not saying that a B is bad, because it really isn't.  If I got a C in my other subjects, I would be pretty happy, because it would be the best I could do right? I got an E for physics last year, and I was happy with that, because it really was the best I could do, and that was that.  But I mean, it's music.  Oh God. I really really really really REALLY want that A. =( 

What a day!

It begun with more extremely rude people that angered me something crazy, but I calmed down after I got paid to go down the slides LOL.

Some idiot 16yr old boy thought it would be a laugh to hit the emergency alarm... full scale emergency action was taken, pools were cleared, all lifeguards to source of alarm, boy standing there feeling stupid. *sigh*

But all in all a good day, moved down to my nan's tonight, so blogging now might be scarce, only when I can find an internet connection =)

So TTFN tu tu, I mean ta ta for now! 

Ahh!!

I woke up rather suddenly this morning, thinking that Ronald had been set on fire!  I could hear him wail as his strings snapped and creek as the fire engulfed his wooden casing. (remote control came in handy as I switched back to the song I was listening to last night)

I think it might have had something to do with a mixture of listening to him last night, noticing that if you listen carefully, you can hear him hum, sounding just like a human, humming softly... that with the unexpected thought of my mum moving him into the garage or burning him when I leave for university.  It's only the garage you might be thinking, but that means that he'll get moved into a cold place.  Moving him will do enough to make him go out of tune, but staying in a cold place when he's used to being warm, is also not a good idea! *sigh*.  but then garage is much better than fire and mum's told me she won't burn him.  I'm really gonna miss Ronald when I go away, he'll be sitting there not being played, when I play him for at least two hours everyday.  Now I have to convert back to the good old keyboards.

Rainey Pants =)

GOD! (that got your attention!) I'm so unfit! I've just been to a BBQ with my family and me and my ikle cousins decided to play IT. two seconds later I'm clutching my chest shouting "heart attack!" and Sasha points and laughs, as I'm gasping for air!!

THAT WOMAN!!!! grrrr... I asked (quite politely i have you know) this old bag for some ice cream to go with my banoffie pie, but she abruptly and rudely replied, NO! Only for the kiddies... Grumble grumble, I AM a kiddie!

Next thing i know, my DAD comes over with banoffie pie and a sky high pile of ice cream with it!!! Some kid! OI! gimmie ice cream!

*cough, scratch itch sniff* we then played a game kinda like hide and seek when the adults decided to go home, and were looking for us for ages. LOL.

Home Is Where You're Piano Is.

Ever had one of those days, where there were so many situations that just made you smile?

Today I was back in the studio, this time with Thomas.  He's such a laugh and the smallest things made me smile.  The best part of today, was when we recorded the rain.  Trailing the long lead out of the studio and half hung out of a window... holding up the cable so not to get it wet when we recorded the rain from outside the huge wooden doors. Then Thomas had another idea of recording the rain that landed on an umbrella.  That scene made me smile so much I'm still smiling now, with Thomas directing his dad who was smiling as we recorded the rain as it fell... a bird even joined in, and you can hear him sing in the song.  Thomas is even going to put a real double bass line in =)  

Perfect.

That's an awful lotta biscuits!

Fixed.

.

So there might still be the odd screw lose inside that head, but the rest is all as it should be, and that, means

everything.

Thank you.

Check out the rain!   

Be Seeing You...

Woah! I just watched another episode of The Prisoner, and they've just transformed no.6 into no.12 and brought in an impersonator to try and crack the poor old chap!

But cunning no.6 knows who he is!

I'm still, however, very discombobulated about all this, well, be seeing you!

The Remote Control Of Life.

Use it to shut things up when you don't want them around.  There's a pause button, a play button, a stop button.  My golly, there's even an eject button... now that's handy!

Why So Serious?

I was in another recording session this morning, watching my vocal parts being edited by Mr. S and Paul for a song soon to be out there.  Whilst that was going on, my brain slowly trailed off and started to think... (dangerous, I know).  The session wasn't boring in anyway, it was actually very interesting as always, but none the less, off I went...  I was thinking about a particularly vivid dream I had last night at about 2am.  For most of it, however, I'm sure I was awake, seeing and hearing everything as clear as day, in some sort of suspended reality dream mode.  I could even feel the breathing in my ear of the Joker as he pressed himself against me to whisper his proposition.

The Joker, for some time, had been sending me the faces, yes just the faces, not the skull, just the skins and hair of many people that I know and like and love.  All had had their mouths distorted to look as if they were smiling yet all were still recognisable.  Every time I received a face, I would ask and scream what he wanted from me.  And he would always answer, "nothing".  He would then put the faces next to each other until there was only one spot left to finish the grand picture... his self portrait made out of all the faces.

He had managed to whittle all those people down, and figured out who the two people are that I care most about and love more than anyone else.  I might not have even realised it myself, because it's not really something people tend to think about, who those two people are, but he figured it out.  

"Now choose."

He stood them before me, and I asked once more, why he was doing this and what they hell he wanted from me.  And in return he said "I just want to see what your character is.  Now choose."  

And then I some how fell asleep.  I didn't wake up screaming or in a state, in fact I didn't even feel scared, I was quite relaxed.  It was more like a dream with a message rather than a threat, and so I call it a dream, not a nightmare. 

Today, everyone looked resplendent, and all was indeed quiet.  So no bad effects and nothing to worry about.  Today I was wondering, were the two people that the Joker had chosen, are they really the two people who I love most and care most about in this world?  What about all the other people who I love and care about?  Do I love those two people more than I love all the other people in my life? Is love just love, or is there different levels of love?  It also got me thinking about what the hell I would do if that situation was to ever come along.  There is absolutely no way I would ever be able to choose. Ever.  I would never even think about choosing.  Good job that situation isn't going to come along! It also showed me how precious people really are, and how we should keep those who we care and love close.

All You Care About, Is Money...

Immense.

A much more serious take on the batman story, set as if in real life.  The Joker's performance was superb and his character one you can love as much as you love batman.  The best villain I've ever seen.

Yet when some of my friends said that they think Heath was a better Joker than Jack, I disagree.  Burton's take on the story is set in the comic book world of the dark Gotham city, with the fictional characters of the Joker and Batman, and in my opinion, the best performance from the Joker possible.  Perfect for that film.  And that goes with the music too... Elfman's style fits perfectly with the twisted, heroic, dark, comic book characters and settings.  Perfect for that film.  Yet Zimmer's (and you can so tell it was his score, very characteristic of the POTC scores) is minimal (using Barry's ideas of no music during fight scenes and showings off of beefy bat mobiles and fast cars and bike, as they do in the James Bond films) and under layered to mimic the seriousness and darkness of the Dark Knight film, again, perfect for that type of movie.

So all in all, probably one of the best films I've ever seen, the Joker spot on.  But I don't think we should compare the films, because they are completely different, even with the well spotted scene by Thomas, in which they copy the original, where the Joker is egging on Batman to hit him.  Yet in this film Batman is on a rather cool bike that I now want, aiming for a Joker with a proper pistol, rather than Batman in the Bat-wing aiming at a Joker with bright lights behind him and the most ridiculously large and long gun I've ever seen.  

Hee hee heee har haaaaa har, hee, har.